quotations about divorce
You know why divorces are so expensive? Because they're worth it.
HENNY YOUNGMAN
stand-up routine
We've put it down, we've patched it up
We both have had our say
Divorce ain't black, divorce ain't white
Just a sad ole shade of gray.
BILL ANDERSON
"Sad Old Shade of Gray"
Heartbreak is a loss. Divorce is a piece of paper.
TAYLOR JENKINS REID
The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo
Divorce is probably of nearly the same date as marriage. I believe, however, that marriage is some weeks the more ancient.
VOLTAIRE
Philosophical Dictionary
Take my last wife. We get on like a house on fire. Last week she took me out to a splendid dinner, she buys me presents, calls me 'old bean' and even phones the Coach and Horses to see whether I've snuffed it or not. But final and damning proof of the failure of our divorce is that she still laughs at my jokes. I wouldn't swap her for a wife.
JEFFREY BERNARD
Low Life: Irreverent Reflections from the Bottom of a Glass
I try not to think of divorce as failing at marriage but rather winning at bitterness and resentment.
ANONYMOUS
The thing that experts agree on is that although divorce is difficult and stressful for kids no matter what, the real harm to kids comes from being subjected to conflict between parents. The longer that lasts, and the more severe it is, the worse it is for your children. If you truly want to shield your children from the pain of divorce, recognize that the more you take the high road with your spouse, the better job you'll do.
EMILY DOSKOW
Nolo's Essential Guide to Divorce
Love, the quest; marriage, the conquest; divorce, the inquest.
HELEN ROWLAND
A Guide to Men
Divorce is like death without a burial.
DANE CUNNINGHAM
Risky Relationships
This divorce you're asking me to give you
I don't want to see it go through
This divorce will make you free and happy
But it will leave me lonely and blue.
I believe what God has brought together
Let no man put apart in the force
I believe that someday you'll be sorry
That you've asked me for this divorce.
KITTY WELLS
"This Divorce", Burning Memories
Divorce is always good news. I know that sounds weird, but it's true because no good marriage has ever ended in divorce. That would be sad. If two people were married and ... they just had a great thing and then they got divorced, that would be really sad. But that has happened zero times.
LOUIS C.K.
"The Annotated Wisdom of Louis C.K.", Splitsider
In our family we don't divorce our men -- we bury them.
RUTH GORDON
Lord Love a Duck
Divorce is the price people play for playing with matches.
EVAN ESAR
20,000 Quips & Quotes
Our D-I-V-O-R-C-E becomes final today
Me and little J-O-E will be goin' away
I love you both and it will be pure H-E double L for me
Oh, I wish that we could stop this D-I-V-O-R-C-E
TAMMY WYNETTE
"D-I-V-O-R-C-E"
I doubt if there is one married person on Earth who can be objective about divorce. It is always a threat, admittedly or not, and such a dire threat that it is almost a dirty word.
NORA JOHNSON
attributed, Women Know Everything!
A lawyer is never entirely comfortable with a friendly divorce, any more than a good mortician wants to finish his job and then have the patient sit up on the table.
JEAN KERR
Mary, Mary
Many a woman would get a divorce if she could do it without making her husband happy.
EVAN ESAR
20,000 Quips & Quotes
Divorce is a declaration of independence with only two signers.
GERALD F. LIEBERMAN
attributed, Divorce: It's All About Control